Dear Louise: How do I deal with my partner lusting after other women?

"Everyone’s boundaries are different – for some, cheating means physical intimacy with another person, for others, receiving or sending nudes, or even watching porn, might feel like a violation of their trust. As with all things in relationships, respect is crucial."

Louise O'Neill. Photograph Moya Nolan

Dear Louise, How do I deal with my partner lusting after other women? I even found a picture of one of his students in college. Is it because he doesn’t get what he wants from me?

There is a truly terrible show on Netflix right now called Sex Life (I have to reiterate how bad the series is – this is not a recommendation to watch it!) in which the main character, Billie, is sexually frustrated in her marriage and starts to fantasise about her toxic old boyfriend.