Mercury Rev's Jonathan Donahue struggles with self doubt in his songwriting abilities
has a crack in his voice. “I can’t explain it,” says the frontman of veteran alternative rock band Mercury Rev.
“It comes upon me from time to time. I don’t like talking about it. It’s there and friends help me and it passes.”
In his home high in the Catskill Mountains in New York State, the singer is contemplating his life-long battle with low self-esteem (in the musical rather than personal sense).
Donahue, who has led Mercury Rev from fringe avant-gardists to deeply- beloved orchestral rockers, explains that the slightest provocation can plunge him into self doubt.
When the dark times strike, it’s all he can do to carry on.
“There was some of this on the new album,” he says, referring to the group’s recently released ninth studio record, The Light In You.
“I have these moments where I think I’m never going to write another song. And then I push through and I find a way out. In the thick of it, though, I’m never sure.”
That he has agonised over The Light In You is surely no surprise. It’s 17 years since Mercury Rev released their break-out record, Deserter’s Song.
That project has cast a shadow Donahue was for a considerable period eager to step beyond
But, with The Light In You, the 49-year-old is once again reconnecting with the sensibilities he explored on his band’s most successful album.
Creatively, there is a sense of coming home.
“It’s the real me,” says Donahue.
“I live in the Catskill Mountains. I grew up here. It speaks to me. People say other parts of our catalogue represent elements of who we are — they say, ‘Well that’s you or this is you’.
"And maybe that’s true. But The Light In You and Deserters’ Songs are ALL of me. It’s who I am to my core.”
Mercury Rev are best thought of as a cross between an early 90s indie rock band (which is how they began life) and a contemplative walk through the woods at dusk.
Their songs are often catchy and typically shot through with a wonder at the beauty of creation.
Impressively, such feelings are conveyed without tipping into whimsy or sentimentality (though they arguably came close with 2001’s All Is Dream).
Like a night-time mist, an eeriness pushes at the edges of their music, creating a powerful unease. Donahue may find nature fascinating — but his writing pulsates with the sense that just because something is easy on the eyes doesn’t mean it isn’t dangerous
The singer is agreeable company, even if you can imagine him literally hugging a tree.
“Making this record was like watching Disney’s Fantasia for the first time,” he says.
“The world opens up to you and everything goes Technicolour. It’s not dissimilar to that part of the Wizard Of Oz where it turns from darkness to light.
“The album has a very autumnal feel. That’s the influence of the Catskills. I was born and raised here — my family has lived here 150 years.
"Halloween is our national holiday. During autumn the mountains turn to flames, with the colours. As autumn comes around and there is the first hint of frost, everyone’s eyes begin to glint.
“It’s there in nature — it is part of me and it makes its way right to the vinyl. There’s no strange science to it.”
In 2011, Mercury Rev toured Deserter’s Songs, playing the record in its entirety every night.
It was an educational experience, reminding Donahue of what really mattered to him. He reconnected with the person he had been in 1998.
“Playing it live, seeing the response in people’s eyes… there was an electricity there that brought to life a part of my DNA that had been dormant for a considerable period of time.”
Some might find the stillness, the overwhelming hush of the natural world, to be lonely and claustrophobia. Not Donahue.
“The quiet provides me the nourishment to make an album. For certain individuals it’s the frenetic pace of New York — they need the outside, those extrovert parts, to feed them. To me, for better or worse, it is from within.
"It’s a different part of the current. Musically speaking I don’t do well in an urban environment. I take strength from the stillness. That is the way I am wired.”
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Mercury Rev formed in Buffalo, New York in 1989.
"The originally line-up was a bit of a shaggy sprawl, including present day members Donahue and guitarist Sean ‘Grasshopper’ Mackowiak, in addition to vocalist David Baker, flautist Suzanne Thorpe and bassist David Fridmann (later to find acclaim as producer of the Flaming Lips and others).
Initially, the group’s sound was somewhat of a mess too. Early albums Yerself Is Steam and Boces were dense and caterwauling – as much a reflection of Baker’s darker sensibilities as of Donahue’s pantheism.
But, with bad blood brewing, Baker left in 1993, in the aftermath of Boces. His departure profoundly affected the group, as Donahue’s voice took centre stage — resulting in the dramatic change in direction that was Deserter’s Songs.
Donahue is looking forward to coming back to Ireland.
Some of Mercury Rev’s most memorable performances have been here. Speaking to me several years ago, guitarist Mackowiak recalled a 1992 gig in Cork at the old Village venue (part of the greatly-mourned Sir Henry’s complex).
After the concert, enthusiastic fans surrounded the Mercury Rev tour bus, essentially trapping the occupants.
For a brief moment the musicians had a sense what it might be like to be in a boy-band.
“I’ll always remember this insane gig we played in Cork,” he told me.
“All these kids started rocking the tour bus. They almost tipped it over. The police had to cool it down. The bus was literally ready to turn right over.”
“Ireland is hugely important to us,” nods Donahue.
“I’m not just saying this — every time we play there it’s special. I guess it’s in my blood [he is Irish-American]. It’s very important to me. I love Ireland. It’s one of those countries. You go there and it speaks to you.”
