Tommy Tiernan Show recap: Shay Given reflects on the deaths of his brother and mother
Shay Given on the Tommy Tiernan Show
Retired goalkeeper Shay Given spoke on the Tommy Tiernan Show about how his mother’s death when he was four impacted his life and also opened up about the loss of his brother last December.
“I get emotional when I talk about her, even now,” he said of his mother. He said he and his five siblings “just had to get on with it” and “never really got to speak about it” when they were young.
He said he channelled his grief into his football career.
“I use it as a strength, I really did, when I played and when I trained I’d try and make her proud.”
Given said the recent loss of his brother caused some grief about his mother’s death to resurface.
“It was tough because you feel all the emotions coming back through the whole family, especially in my dad as well.”
His brother Kieran passed away on December 23 and his uncle died two days later, on Christmas Day.
“It was a tough couple of days for us all, but my dad especially. The following week we had two funerals in three days.”
He said they knew during his brother’s last visit home from Germany that he would not be there again and they spent quality time together as a family.
“No one said it but at the time we all knew this was his last trip home.”
Tiernan was also joined by comedian Deirdre O’Kane who reflected on her comedy career and the challenge she faced in recent years when her husband was diagnosed with stage four cancer.
After stepping away from stand-up for a decade when her children were young, O’Kane said she feels she’s getting “a second bite of the cherry”.
She said she feels stand-up “saved me several times over”, particularly when her husband, Stephen Bradley, faced a health crisis.
“My husband was very sick and that was a very serious time, very tough time in our lives. But I was still going to tell jokes. And it was a release of some kind and I was able to suspend the reality of what we were going through.”
She described her husband’s diagnosis as “very, very scary” but said she copes well in a crisis, thanks in part to a life spent on a comedy stage.
“Within that, there's a bit of fear hidden but I kind of refused to go there,” she admitted, but said it made her more resilient.
“Having gone through what we went through with Stephen and all those tough things that we all go through, they just make you stronger.”
Finally, Tiernan met artist Bernard Canavan who spoke about struggling with identity as an adopted person.
Canavan grew up in Longford in the 1950s and “was the only child who wasn't of a natural parent in the town”.
“Most of the stories are women talking about lost children, but I had to live as a lost child and that really shaped me. I didn’t know who I was. I struggle a lot with identity.”
He said he made a connection with an aunt when he was 60 and remained close with her until she died aged 99.
“When we discover who we are, it’s going to change your life.”
