Lindsay Woods' tips for expectant parents

Whilst pregnant with our first child, both myself and my husband did all of the things.

We took all of the classes, bought all of the stuff and followed all of the advice. We were on time for everything and looked rested and content. After each antenatal group session, we would glide serenely from the building to enjoy an un-interrupted leisurely lunch to mull over the name choices for our impending bundle of joy.