Sex advice with Suzi Godson: Keeping the spark alive as we get older

My husband and I have been together for over 20 years — I’m 47, he is 50. He suggests, as a kind of new year’s resolution, that we bring some more “excitement” to the bedroom. 

He is probably right because, although we are still very attracted to one another, sex has become somewhat predictable. I don’t know where to start.

The first thing you ought to do is work out what you both mean by “excitement”. While it is great to explore new ways of making sex more exciting, if your idea of revving things up is buying a sex toy and his is having a threesome, you might end up creating the wrong kind of tension.