Ask Audrey has been sorting out Cork people for years

Got an issue? Ask Audrey...

How’re oo goin on? The missus is back from a city break in Barcelona and didn’t she get herself a tattoo. Nothing will do her now but that I get one myself. What do you think it should say? — Ger Mick Michael, veer left outside Ballinascarthy and hope for the best.

You don’t see many tattoos west of Bandon. I hear they are about as rare down there as taking a shower during the week.