I’m unhappy I have to initiate sex always with my husband

Q. I am married to a kind, considerate man but he is not particularly interested in sex. If I take the initiative he responds, but I am beginning to wonder if he feels any desire for me. When we met first the sex was great and exciting, but now I feel it’s all up to me. We have two children under eight.

A. When one partner is not engaging in sex the other will often believe they are no longer desirable. You say he is not excited any longer and deep down this hurts. It’s important to remember you are not the only couple with this problem. Little or no sex in relationships is a common scenario presented to relationship counsellors.

Being sexual with your partner in the beginning was exciting. This is part of the bonding and intimacy. It is also necessary to nourish the relationship and to connect with your husband.