Sex File: He doesn't like me talking when we're making love 

Any man who interprets useful advice on how to ensure his sexual partner's enjoyment as "a bit upsetting" has so much to learn that I'm not sure I could, hand on heart, advise you to persist with the relationship.

None of this is rocket science, but for men who have been raised on a diet of porn, reciprocity, communication, consideration and even affection have nothing to do with sex.

I've always been quite clear about what I like in bed. Saying what I enjoy out loud turns me on, and previous partners have found it arousing too.

But my partner has revealed that he has always found it a bit "upsetting". When I asked how he would rather I communicate, he said he'd prefer moans rather than instructions. I'm a bit put out. How do we navigate this?