Sex File: Can I make my marriage as hot as my affair?

Infidelity rocks a marriage to its core, and rebuilding it can take years

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After a short, doomed but exhilarating affair, I confessed all to my wife, whom I still love. After counselling, we committed to rebuilding our relationship and sex life. I know I've done the right thing in choosing my marriage, but how can we start a new chapter that excites us both?

Sometimes the things that people leave out of their letters tell me more than the things that they put in. You say, for example, that you and your wife have been through counselling together, and that you are certain you have made the right decision to stay in the marriage, but you don't say anything about your wife. How do you think she would respond if you posed this question to her? Do you think she might be keen to think of some new and imaginative approaches that would make the sex that you have with her as exciting as the sex you had with your mistress? I don't think so.