Sex File: We've separated but still sleep together 

'Ending a marriage is not one single gesture.'

My husband and I agreed to separate in the middle of last year after 13 years. However, we're still living together while we sort out arrangements with the kids, and find ourselves sleeping together on and off (sometimes once a week). It's definitely not make-up sex, I'm clear I want to move on, so why can't I stop?

There is clearly no one waiting in the wings for either of you — if there were, this wouldn't be happening — and so, despite your certainty about wanting to move on, the door that leads back into your marriage is still slightly ajar.