Sex File: His cheesy playlist of '90s ballads is turning me off in the bedroom

Music is a matter of personal taste. There must be a place of common ground - you just need to find it

Being forced to listen to music you don't like is going to make you miserable.

I've started dating a guy who is sweet and romantic, but I don't enjoy his 'sexy music'. He has a bedroom playlist of cheesy 1990s soul ballads. I find it off-putting and not sexy at all.

It's worth considering that the playlist isn't actually for your benefit. Your partner's playlist may be putting you off, but it is probably turning him on. Music is an intensely sensory experience and neuroscientific research has uncovered the fact that it affects the endogenous opioid system, the same pleasure pathways that make food, drugs and sex so moreish. It also activates specific parts of the brain that are involved with movement and dance.