Joe McNamee: There have been veggie sausages for almost as long as there’s been hippies

Veggie discs? Let our taste buds do the talking

Today I pay tribute to the sterling efforts of a band of linguistically fastidious MEPs dedicated to clearing clear up confusion around food nomenclature on behalf of consumers of the 27 member states of Europe. Specifically, Centre Right French MEP Celine Imart’s initiative that led to the European Parliament Agriculture Committee to vote last September to ban the use of terms such as “burger”, “sausage” and “steak” for plant-based foods.

Imagine the shame and embarrassment of serving up coconut and two veg at a dinner party, blissfully unaware the ‘meat’ on the inside of the shell is not that of a mammal. Picture the mocking laughter and derision were you to attempt to atone with prime cauliflower steaks or succulent beef tomato. And who among us has not despaired at the lack of ham or any pork at all in a ‘hamburger’?

Apologies for my facetiousness but you can see just how nonsensical this is when pursued to its ultimate logic. A similar move was voted down in 2019, studies showing consumers were not all confused or unable to differentiate and, last May, the European Academies Science Advisory Council (EASAC), recommended policymakers increase support for meat alternatives for reasons related to climate, health and food security.

Yet, bolstered by the swing to the right in the EU parliament after the last Euro elections, the initiative was reborn anew. Ostensibly, it is to support farmers but many other MEPs say it is a result of lobbying by the industrial meat and livestock sector. 

What’s more, I strongly suspect it is not about providing clarity for easily gulled carnivorous consumers, but rather a blurring of transparency of choice for the huge cohort of younger consumers switching to vegetarian or vegan meat alternatives for environmental and health reasons in numbers that have spooked the meat sector. France’s livestock and meat industry body, Interbev, has led the charge, saying: “Without clear safeguards, consumers risk being misled by products that are disguised as meat, but are not meat.”

There have been beanburgers and veggie sausages for almost as long as there’s been hippies. Anyone with an age in double digits still unable to differentiate between meat and meat alternatives requires protection under an entirely different sort of legislation. But I suspect the more recent arrival of the multinational corporate food sector to the burgeoning meat-alternative market, has the livestock sector terrified, especially by lab-created plant-based proteins that mimic so uncannily well the real flesh-and-blood deal, right down to the ‘meaty juices’ bleeding out during the cooking process.

Under proposed EU rules, veggie burgers could be rebranded “veggie discs”, vegetarian sausages as “veggie tubes”, though many MEPs argue it won’t change anything for farmers. Even Imart’s own European People’s Party is divided. EPP leader Manfred Weber, from Germany, the largest European market for plant-based food products, said before a recent plenary vote: “Consumers are not stupid when they go to the supermarkets and buy their products.” Nonetheless, the vote passed, meaning it now has to be ratified by a majority of the 27 member states to become law.

Even if half the planet were to turn vegan, livestock farmers could make a good living. 

Actually, make that a far better living — currently they are least rewarded for the most work in the chain from farm to industrial processing to retail.

It would require infinitely shorter supply chains and a return to selling directly into local markets, but then the industrial meat processors and giant retailers would lose out — and frostbite would become the greatest hazard in hell.

However, I suspect this linguistic straitjacket will eventually strangle itself, as its own logic contorts itself into inevitably farcical conclusions. Such legislation will have to apply to all food sectors and all European languages. In Spain, for example, ‘filete’, the Spanish for ‘steak’, is used for cuts of fish, such as ‘filete de lubina’ (sea bass fillet) and ‘lomos de atún’ (tuna loin or steak). And what of our own tuna and salmon steaks? Very few things in the real world, do ‘exactly what they say on the tin’ so why not let our own taste buds be the ultimate arbiter of choice.

Table Talk

The wonderful and impossibly talented Hilary Quinn, senior pastry chef at Ballymaloe House, returns with her Mince Pie Project, now in its third year and run in memory of the late Hazel Allen, with all monies raised going to Cork’s Marymount Hospice.

Hilary is an especially fine baker and her premium handmade mince pies exist in a place well north of exquisite. Ordered online and available for delivery anywhere in the country, they are made with quality dried fruits, Ballymaloe orchard apples, Green Saffron spices, and beef suet from Frank Murphy’s butchers in Midleton, all housed in a superb flaky pie crust. Online sales opened this week and orders will be dispatched on December 8 Box of six, €20.

the-mince-pie-project.myshopify.com

A trip to Waterford is always welcome but especially from late November through to December 23 for the Winterval Festival (open from Thursday to Sunday each week). With a programme of some 50-plus events, the prime attraction is the Winterval Christmas Market featuring over 100 food, craft and drinks producers and creators, on the streets of the city’s older cultural quarter.

winterval.ie

TODAY’S SPECIAL

Forgive me for breaking one of my own cardinal rules by mentioning Christmas in November but of all the festive food products, I have special time for the range from Folláin, the Gaeltacht-based jam and preserves maker in Ballyvourney, Co Cork.

The Christmas Preserve Gift Box (€30), includes Christmas Spiced Marmalade, Mulled Wine and Winter Berry Jam, Spiced Apple Jelly, Cranberry Sauce and Caramel with Irish Cream Liqueur. A Cheese Pairing Gift Box (€20), carries Chargrilled Red Pepper Relish, Caramelised Onion with Black Garlic Relish, Irish Tomato Relish, Fig Jam, Tomato and Chilli Jam, and Spiced Apple Chutney.

However, what marks out the Folláin offering as truly special is their ongoing partnership with the Simon Community, now in its third year, with the company pledging a whopping 50% of proceeds from all online sales through to December 31.

follain.ie