'We have the same passion': Restaurateur couples share how they blend love and business

Running a restaurant together is demanding — and working with your significant other can be just as stressful. Four partners in life and in business tell Ali Dunworth how they make it work

Some of the couples that have kept it together in the Irish food business

Máire and Paul Flynn, The Tannery, Co Waterford

Máire and Paul’s first date was set up so successfully that apparently after the date they both declared to different friends: “That’s the person I’m going to marry.”

They went on to fulfil that promise and have been married for 30 years, running The Tannery restaurant together for 27 years, and adding a cookery school and townhouse accommodation along the way.

“We are the perfect foil for one another as a business,” Paul says.

“I’m impetuous and spontaneous, whereas Máire’s more thoughtful and just really good at business.

“She does all the stuff I can’t do. I can’t say enough about her. It’s not easy to keep a restaurant open as long as we have. You have to roll with the punches, be intuitive, adaptable, and change direction when you need to. It’s probably easier to do that together.”

Their longevity in the business is something they both cherish, particularly in the current climate.

Máire says: “As we all know, things are difficult. But I think our experience will get us through.

“There have been so many rocky patches and I’d say another very rocky patch is coming, but we are very proud of all our years and how we’ve kept the whole show going despite adversity sometimes.”

Paul and Máire Flynn at the Tannery Restaurant, Dungarvan, Co Waterford. Picture: Dan Linehan

With regards to Valentine’s Day, neither of them would claim to be very gushing. “We’re cynical like that,” Paul says, adding: “Not romantic, well maybe that’s not entirely true, but not on Valentine’s Day anyway.”

A romantic meal for Paul is “when we’re in the perfect restaurant together, it doesn’t have to be typically romantic”.

For him, a standout meal was in Italy.

“We were having a kind of bad day, because it was really hot, but then we went to this amazing restaurant and sat in the garden. There were twinkly lights and an ice cream machine. It was perfection in a way.”

Máire says that after 30 years of marriage, her attitude and approach to life has changed from romance to gratitude: “To still be together, alive and happy after all these years is an achievement.”

A recent night spent with family and friends at La Gordita in Dublin was her pick.

“It might not conventionally appear as the most romantic meal, but it was a joyous night.”

• tannery.ie

Paul Flynn's Tafelspitz Steak

A classic Tafelspitz: boiled beef in broth with vegetables, strong horseradish, apple sauce and a flurry of chives.

Servings

2

Preparation Time

 25 mins

Cooking Time

 20 mins

Total Time

 45 mins

Course

 Main

Ingredients

• 2 x 250g striploin steaks

• 1 tbsp sunflower oil

• a knob of butter

• 1 sprig of fresh thyme

• FOR THE APPLE SAUCE:

• 1 large cooking apple, peeled, cored and sliced

• 3 tbsp water

• 1 tbsp golden brown sugar

• a pinch of ground cinnamon

• FOR THE SOUR CREAM:

• 200ml sour cream

• 2 tbsp chopped fresh chives

• 1 tbsp horseradish sauce

Method

1. To make the apple sauce, put the apple, water, sugar and cinnamon in a small saucepan and cook over a medium heat for 10 minutes, until the apple breaks up and turns into a sweet compote. You can help it along by breaking up the apple a little with a wooden spoon halfway through cooking.

2. Mix the sour cream, chives and horseradish together and put in a nice bowl.

3. Season the steak, drizzle over the oil and rub it in. Heat a heavy-based grill pan, or even better, a ridged chargrill pan, over a high heat. When the pan is smoking gently, add the steaks.

4. For medium rare they will need 2 minutes on each side. For medium, 2½ minutes. They should feel a little soft and springy. Just leave them on a little longer if you prefer them more cooked.

5. When they are nearly ready, add the butter and thyme. Baste the steaks, then put them on a warm plate along with any residual butter. Cover in foil to rest for 5 minutes or so.

6. When serving, pour any residual juices over the steaks as a delicate little gravy. Serve with the apple sauce and horseradish and chive sour cream on the side.
8. From Butter Boy: Collected Stories and Recipes by Paul Flynn (ninebeanrowsbooks.com)

Catherine and Kevin Dundon, Dunbrody House, Co Wexford

Catherine and Kevin first met in the 80s, at a Dublin nightclub.

“That’s how everyone met then,” Catherine says.

It took them a few years of pursuing their careers and living in separate countries before they married and moved back to Ireland, where they bought Dunbrody House, in Co Wexford.

They have been running the hotel and restaurant together for over 25 years.

“At the start, it was majorly stressful,” Catherine says. “We did a lot together, but as the business develops you take on more defined roles.”

Catherine looks after front of house, sales, and marketing, while the kitchen is Kevin’s realm.

Along with defined roles, keeping business strictly professional is something they both cite as essential.

“Try not to get upset with each other, no more than two colleagues might get upset,” Kevin says.

“As soon as you walk out the door, forget about what just happened.”

They’ve had plenty of highlights over the years and, for Kevin, achieving goals together is one of the best parts about that: “If you win something or you hit targets, you’ve something to celebrate as a couple and as a business.”

Catherine and Kevin Dundon. Photograph: Moya Nolan

For Catherine, having a shared vision and similar mindsets has been a big asset.

“We have the same passion in terms of quality, local and authenticity. We don’t agree on absolutely everything, but 90% of the time we do. When you’re both putting in the same effort, the payback is shared.”

Valentine’s Day isn’t a big deal for them, Kevin says it was “sort of always written off our diaries because we’ve had to work, so it’s never really come into play”.

Although, Catherine does mention she’d be annoyed if she didn’t get a card.

When it comes to romantic meals, for Catherine it was on the Orient Express for Kevin’s 50th birthday: “That was absolutely amazing, every bit of it. The train, the staff, it was really memorable, a once-in-a-lifetime experience.”

For Kevin, it’s a tie between eating at Alain Ducasse in Monaco and a night spent at home during covid.

“We were just cooking and eating pizza from the pizza oven and drinking a bottle of champagne. The place was empty and the weather was beautiful, and we were sitting on the terrace, just the two of us.”

• dunbrodyhouse.com

Kevin Dundon's Roasted Rack of Lamb & Rösti Potatoes

"I like Wexford Hook Head lamb as it is my local area, but many farms around the country produce fantastic lamb like Achill Island, Comeragh Mountain, Connemara and so on!"

Servings

2

Preparation Time

 24 mins

Cooking Time

 1 hours 25 mins

Total Time

 1 hours 49 mins

Course

 Main

Ingredients

• 1 x 6-7 bone Irish racks of lamb (2-3 bones per person), French trimmed

• 2 tbsp Dijon mustard

• 3 tbsp parsley, Freshly chopped

• 150g Fresh white breadcrumbs

• 100g ( 50g+50g) butter, melted

• ½ lemon zest

• Salt & Pepper

• 3 onions, cut in wedges

• 2 carrots, sliced in half

• 2 large potatoes, peeled and grated

• 4- 5 tbsp Irish rapeseed oil

• 80g salad leaves

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 200°C.

2. Place the onions, carrots and garlic on the base of a roasting tray.

3. Then, spread mustard on the rack of lamb. Keep aside.

4. In a bowl, combine the parsley, breadcrumbs, lemon zest, 50g melted butter and salt and pepper together. And gently press the mixture onto the mustard brushed lamb racks.

5. Place in the oven and roast for 20-25 minutes depending on how you like you meat cooked. Remove from the heat and allow to rest for 5 minutes if possible. Carve as required, I would normally allow 2 – 3 bones per person.

6. In the meantime, prepare the Rösti. In a bowl, grate the potatoes. Squeeze excess liquid from the potatoes by twisting the grated mix in a tea towel, then return the potato to the bowl and season with some salt and pepper.

7. Melt the rest of the butter and oil in a large frying pan, on a moderate/ low heat.

8. Take a small handful of the grated potato and make 4 patties ( 2 per person) of about 4 cm diameter.

9. Place each potato disc onto the pan and cook for about 5 - 6 minutes on each side. They are cooked, when the rösti is crisp on the outside and soft through in the middle.

10. Serve the lamb carved with the potato rösti and some salad leaves.

David O’Halloran and Martin Buckley, The Lifeboat Inn, Co Cork

David and Martin met while at college in Cork – Martin was training to be a chef, David to be a plumber.

The recession meant David made the switch to working in hospitality and he hasn’t looked back since. They bought The Lifeboat Inn, in Courtmacsherry, Cork and opened it in June 2017.

On social media, they are better known as ‘the lads from the Lifeboat’ — where they share their daily lives with over 60,000 followers.

“We’ve been on such a journey together already,” Martin reflects, “getting into a relationship, going through the marriage equality referendum, voting together and then opening the business together.

“This year, the highlight has been the social media, that’s gotten a lot of positive attention for us.”

The social media is something they are both proud of, David particularly loves that it gives Martin a chance to shine.

“Being a chef, people don’t get to see him as much — so it’s lovely to see his personality come through.”

In business and at home, supporting each other is a big part of how they’ve made it work. As David says: “We both know what each other is going through.”

Valentine’s Day tends to go over their heads, according to Martin. “It’s like that with our way of life.”

Martin Buckley and David O'Halloran who work together at the Lifeboat Inn, Courtmacsherry, Cork. Picture: Dan Linehan

They both prefer to put the emphasis on making time for each other year-round, eating out being one of their favourite things to do together, so they’ve plenty of romantic meals to choose from.

For Martin, he thinks back to when they got married in Napa Valley and stayed at a place called Meadowood.

“It’s gorgeous and I’ll never forget the meal we had there. I think the time in our lives was very special because it was before we opened the business, before the marriage equality referendum had passed, we were very comfortable being together as a gay couple in public — so that was just a very special meal for us.”

For David, it was an unforgettable lunch in Amsterdam. They’d booked two Michelin-starred restaurant Bord’eau (now called Flore). “They rang to ask if we could move the booking to dinner because they had no other bookings for lunch, but we had a flight to catch.

“They went ahead with our lunch booking anyway. It was probably Amsterdam’s best restaurant, and it was just the two of us like we’d booked the whole place out. That was quite special.” 

• lifeboatinn.ie

Jumoke Akintola and Peter Hogan, Beach House, Co Waterford

Jumoke and Peter met in London 15 years ago while doing the same teacher training.

They were working as teachers when Peter started a pop-up food business. Jumoke remembers: “One day, we both came home from work, from school, and independently said, ‘oh do you want to do something different? Why don’t we try and do food full-time?’

“We didn’t think we could do that in London so we moved to Dublin and opened Fish Shop in Blackrock Market.”

They now own three restaurants together.

In Dublin, they have Fish Shop on Benburb St and Bar Pez on Kevin St. In Tramore, Co Waterford, where they also live, they have Beach House.

There’s lots to love about working together.

Peter says: “It is the whole reason why you do it, the freedom of being able to just dream up an idea and create something that without you doing it, just wouldn’t exist.”

Peter Hogan and Jumoke Akintola at the Beach House, Turkey Road, Tramore East, Tramore, Co. Waterford. Picture: Dan Linehan

Jumoke praises his work, adding: “I think Peter is really good at what he does, and I’m lucky enough to see him do that up close. I get to see another side of him.”

When it comes to advice on working together, Jumoke says time is everything.

“You’ll figure it out, but it will take time.”

Peter recommends enjoying it as much as you can:

“We’d still do it all again if we had the choice.”

“There are ups and downs with it. It’s a big risk and it’s kind of a high-wire thing that you do, so when you’re lucky enough that things work, to be able to share that with the other person is kind of priceless.”

Neither of them is big into Valentine’s Day, but they do like to plan trips together — London being a place they both have fond memories of. In Jumoke’s case, a meal at Noble Rot, in Soho, last year stands out as one of their most romantic.

“We’ve been there loads of times before, but for some reason this time we just had the best time. We were laughing non-stop about everything and I thought ‘isn’t it great, you know, we’re still having the best time together after all these years’.”

Peter chose London also but for him, it’s when they visit St John restaurant.

“It’s our go-to favourite place. It’s just a super fun place, it’s got an amazing bar and a beautiful aesthetic. We go back every August.”

• beachhousetramore.ie