Treasure these exclusive excerpts from Old MacConnell’s Almanack

Great news altogether for you all, ye have hit the jackpot, at last! Take my word for it, this article, in a very short time, will be worth more than your farm and the holding next to it, or your agri-related business, and that is because it carries the very first excerpt from Old MacConnell’s Almanack, exposed to all of you weeks before the events described below actually occur.

At a time when bankrupt RTE is selling off its precious works of art at auctions in London and elsewhere, and raising only a measly few thousand euros in the process, it is the pure truth that a copy of this paper, marking the virgin appearance of my Almanack, is more valuable.