YOU might want to avert your ears. At the very least, it might be advisable to ask your maiden aunts to leave the room. I’m going to say one of those things you’re not allowed to say.

THERE’S no word for it but ‘scandalous.’ Secret payments to well-paid people, out of either public funds or charitable donations, are a scandal. It has to be highlighted, and it has to be ended.

WHAT do Gordon Jeyes and Joe Schmidt have in common? You may not have heard of Gordon Jeyes, although you will. Neither Jeyes nor Schmidt is Irish, but both are doing jobs that matter. It’s important to all of us that they both win.

IS IT just me, or do you have a sense that we’re turning a corner? That, as a nation, we’re beginning to have reasons to be proud? That maybe, just maybe, we can make it after all?

WHEN is sex illegal? That is, normal, consensual sex between adults? Sex that is an act of love, as part of a loving relationship? Never, I thought.

“I’M afraid there’s no doubt about it, Taoiseach,” the head of G2 said. “It’s sabotage. You have a mole.”

I CAN still remember the day I met Izzie. Why wouldn’t I — it was my birthday. My 48th birthday to be exact, and Izzie was the first guest to arrive for the celebrations.

I never have my Concise Oxford Dictionary with me when I need it.

It was a weekend of positive and reassuring mood music.

Lions led by donkeys. The phrase refers to the brave soldiers led by incompetent generals in the First World War, but it could just as easily refer to us.