Some people love theirs. Others hate it and would change it if they could. It’s your name — not just your first name but the whole package.

It had been a while since I was in one: The old-style restaurant. By old-style, I don’t mean a mediaeval tavern where food is served by lusty maids who slam down jugs of ale in front of you while looking at you lasciviously. I mean pre-2000 old-style.

A man called Andy talks gently in my ear and I’m at ease with that. It’s part of a New Year’s Resolution.

YOU don’t see them in coffee-table books. They don’t appear on JustAnotherListWebsite.com’s ‘20 Reasons To Visit Ireland Before You Die’. They get a bad press. 

A COLD wind is sweeping through the house. But it doesn’t originate from any point on the map, unless there is a cardinal direction on the compass called ‘CHANGE’. Yes, a howling Change-rly gale is whirling, leaving a trail of neatness in its wake.

MY car doesn’t have a complicated dashboard. It gives very little feedback or nothing involving the word ‘Diagnostics’ or “Realtime Information”. “Get petrol” or “The key is on”, it mutters gruffly from time to time. Except today.

THE last refuge of the columnist/scoundrel — predictions for the following year — is back. Shur, where would you be without it? “Better off”, says you.

THE letterbox clanks. As is always the case, I gallop downstairs to see what the post brings. This, I think, is a feature of the self-employed. The lack of a buzzing office atmosphere means that the postman’s arrival is a big deal. What will today bring? Maybe I’ve finally won the million euro in the Prize Bonds?

Despite all the warnings, some of you will be unable to resist. Drink may have been taken, endorphins coursing in your veins, inhibitions lost. Before you know it, as your colleagues at the Christmas party stand nearby, aghast, you are dancing.

THE word of 2014 is ‘vape’. It refers to electronic cigarettes, which gradually spread this year. Perhaps you were talking to someone and, suddenly, they made a movement towards their mouth.