From a whisper to a scream as Andy proves handy

WHEN IN DOUBT, always turn to Dylan, I say.

In this case, however, the eponymous sage is neither Bob nor Thomas, but a 13-year-old from Monaghan who texted his mum as Saturday’s game at Croke Park wended its dreary way to what would have been an even drearier conclusion but for Andy’s Keogh last-minute intervention.

Exhibiting the kind of precocious football knowledge that only 13-year-olds can, Dylan said that he didn’t want Ireland to win, pointing out that Jack Charlton and Mick McCarthy had both lost their opening games as Ireland manager before going on to lead the team to the finals of the World Cup, whereas Brian Kerr and Steve Staunton had both won their opening games but subsequently failed to qualify for anything.