A solution to everything

MORE than one devoted reader — hello, Frank and Irene Blennerhassett in Youghal — has written to the sports desk bemoaning the absence of this column over the past month.

Faced with this veritable trickle of concern, the Commander In Chief has ordered me to break my silence on the humanitarian and charitable work which I carry out around the globe, in my spare time and entirely at my own expense, when I’m not being tasked with the more onerous duty of writing about the eircom League Club Licensing scheme and other such vital concerns.

I’m not one to blow my own trumpet, of course, but suffice to say that Afghanistan, Iraq and Gaza have all felt the benefit of my troubleshooting expertise and mediation nous over the past four weeks. And, to be fair, the old air miles stack up nicely as well.