At last the end is near to this sad, incredible Cork fiasco

IT’S nearly over this incredible Cork hurling fiasco. We’re talking days rather than weeks.

Take this old hack’s word for it. And thanks be to God that the end is in sight. It’s been woeful stuff altogether. It’s been like a sideline melee on a wet Sunday in the middle of a junior game between two neighbouring teams near the bottom of the table.

But, as the late Ronnie Drew used sing, it’s nearly over now.

As a veteran reporter I’ve covered thousands of disputes in my time.

After a while you get a feel for them no matter from what spectrum of life they come. They have common elements. In the beginning they flare up usually because of unresolved matters from earlier times. Then they get hotter. And hotter still. All sorts of issues which had little to do with the initial breakdown come into play, attracted like magnets to the action.

Parties say things they don’t want to utter at all in the heat of the moment. Ultimatums are loudly issued. And finally a climax is reached, an explosion of opinions, and after that it is not long before the inevitable compromise and resolution.

We are there now following the dramatic hurling squad press conference on Monday night in the Maryborough Hotel and last night’s meeting of the Cork County Board. The breakthrough is imminent. I do not know what will happen or the dimensions and consequences of it. But it is coming fast and the sooner the better for the whole hurling world. It’s been a dirty old scrappy old bad-tempered thing so far.

We’ll know the settlement details, I estimate, before the end of the week.

Behind that there is something that fascinates me and which has far wider implications for Ireland as a whole than just the settlement of a sporting row in Cork. It is this. Whatever spin doctor has been advising the 2008 panel is worth his/her weight in gold. Brian Cowen needs him/her yesterday. No expensive Government PRO or spin doctor of the recent past has come anywhere close to doing such dramatically powerful public relations work for clients as the gifted hand/hands who produced Monday night’s performance for the waiting national media.

It was flawless. It was mighty. If it was on the playing field it would have run away with the All-Ireland.

There was the entire panel on display. They were wearing their Cork sweatshirts. They looked fit, composed and together. If even one member of the panel was absent the effect would have been destroyed but they were all there. And they were all speaking with the one tongue. And the younger members of the squad spoke as much as did the veterans like Donal Óg Cusack, Seán Óg Ó hAilpín and John Gardiner. And all of them resoundingly declared that they were not being controlled, as alleged, by their seniors. That was a powerful element of the evening as well.

Frequently down the years when a player or players have a falling out with their managers or county boards they have found themselves isolated.

No matter how strong their case they usually handle it badly and disappear like snow off the ditches.

This was different. This tightly bonded group of players displayed all the qualities they have often showed in the past to pull tight games out of the fire. It was Three Musketeers stuff — All for One and One for All. And it was highly impressive.

Indeed if there is no professional spin doctor or spin doctors involved and if that event was totally planned by the players themselves — or a group of them — then it is essential for the welfare of this nation that the group form a full time public relations agency when they eventually hang up their boots and hurls. And the government should rush to be their first clients!

The County Board was meeting last night to ponder the position. Gerald McCarthy and his selectors have plenty to ponder. In advance of any outcome at time of writing it has been my experience that all county boards in the land need spin doctors very badly indeed. They do not handle crunch issues with the necessary flair a lot of the time, even boards which include such acclaimed operators as Frank Murphy. And, come to that, the weakness in the players’ requests the other evening was that the issue in relation to the managerial selection process be referred back to the Cork clubs. That is dispatching the problems into the heart of the jungle in this view.

But it will not come to that. It’s nearly over now. Relax. And if I’m wrong I will eat the Australian kangaroo — leather hat which my daughter brought me home from Down Under a few years ago.

Cork were champions that year too.