Enjoying a jaunt up to the Gers for last Fergie-Smith love-in

YOU don’t need me to tell you that this one hell of an expensive week, although I concede my own particular expenses sheet is probably a tad less onerous than yours, dear austerity-packaged reader.

Still, like all Brits, I’m mentally writing my cheque to Biffo for the approximately €400 per household that some foam-mouthed verdophobe tabloid editor has calculated the bailout will cost us over here.

Not that I mind, I hasten to add: I think we’d owe you a fair bit in reparations for the past 800-odd years, after all.