Thumping Pompey rings an eerie bell

IS it 2004 already? A manager seemingly on the brink, making bizarre statements and boring us to death. Defeat in France, in the cup no one wants to enter.

A lazy limp to fourth place, provided everyone else caves in. An unnerving reliance on Gerrard and an injury-prone goal machine hinting worryingly about departure. Walloping Portsmouth in early March, making it the 23rd corner turned this season.

Liverpool may be close to financial chaos, so here’s hoping we patented the time machine we’ve clearly invented. Frankly, I can think of better years to revisit.