Take it for Granted: we ain’t special any more

I FOUND myself humming “we’renot special anymore” as I left Stamford Bridge on Sunday — and that was somewhat cheerful, compared to much of the talk around me, as I trudged back to the pub.

We were ordinary, to say the least and the dour-faced Grant is finding out rather quickly that delivering attractive free-flowing football means more than just talking about it at post-match interviews.

The games against Schalke and Everton showed the City hammering to be exactly the fluke result that many feared it was. Schalke in particular was very Mourinho in its execution, as under him the football we played away from home in Europe was often painful to watch — the difference is that Abramovich would have used exactly this sort of result as a stick to beat Mourinho with, whereas Grant is seemingly untouchable, no matter how turgid the football is and how naïve his substitutions and tactics are.

My reasons for disliking Grant are logical, sensible reasons: his inexperience, his “who you know rather than what you know” rise to the top, the emperor’s new clothes “attacking” football that we are meant to be playing, the way his appointment came about... but these things have become almost incidental to me.

My hatred of the man (yes, I do mean that) is beginning to consume me. If he appears on my TV, I turn it off; if I turn to a page in a newspaper and see his face dolefully staring out, I dispose of said paper. Just the mention of his name turns me from a reasonably sane individual into a Tourette’s ranter. I know that this is not the behaviour of a rational human being. That makes me dislike him even more.

And as for the midfield — I’m sure Lampard isn’t looking forward to the prospect of having to rely on a collection of players who haven’t exactly excelled in the middle of the park this season, with the exception of the ever-classy Makelele, especially if, as many believe, Frank is putting himself in the shop window for the transfer merry-go-round this summer.

Of course we will have the possible benefits of the January transfer window, but I doubt anyone of any note will be available until the end of the season. So what do we do — write this season off and everything above and beyond expectation is a bonus? Well, that was my feeling initially. Taking into account the turmoil, the African Cup of Nations and the various injuries, I would have been happy simply with Champions League qualification, but now I am beginning to wonder if that, too, will be beyond us this season.

How would Abramovich react to this if, as we are led to believe, this is the trophy he covets most in the world? Could he forgive his patsy the ignominy of non-qualification? Could we attract the calibre of player needed to challenge for trophies if there wasn’t the possibility of European glory? Putting aside the actual game for a moment, the Germans once again showed us how football should be run last week. Reasonably-priced tickets; understated policing; free passage on public transport or free passage on special buses laid on for us; a new stadium that manages to combine individualism with ever-present German efficiency; helpful stewards who even put up our banners for us, pre-prepared with gaffer tape — and then not being held in at all after the match — straight out and into free buses to take us back to town, direct to the station no less, so those staying elsewhere could easily reach their destination — free of charge obviously — on the all-night trains. The rest of Europe please take note.

Is anyone keeping note of how many dodgy penalties Liverpool are getting this season? I was, but have lost count. To be honest it’s almost worth it just to keep the whingeing sods off the radio. Their “luck” with the referees does prove that I was wrong however when I said that these decisions even themselves out over a season.

We face a week’s break now and perhaps Grant could use the time to figure out how he is going to emulate his predecessor as the current fare is not cutting it. The Arsenal game will really see where we are now as opposed to under the old regime.

Wenger never beat us with José at the helm and I had just got to the point where I actually looked forward to those matches rather than feared them. I suppose it will be back to my rabbit’s foot and four leaf clover this season.

If we get turned over at the Emirates in December, Avram Grant will really begin to see how supporters feel about him.

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