A word on behalf of minority sport

Hello? Excuse me? Sorry to butt in but …WILL YOU ALL STOP BANGING ON ABOUT BLOODY CRICKET FOR A MINUTE?!

There, that’s better. Thank you.

And apologies, of course, to this cricket-mad little nation of ours, a place where, since time immemorial, little boys and girls have dreamt of nothing else but growing up to sport a big long beard like WG Grace or make complete eejits of themselves on ‘A Question of Sport’ like yer man Tuffers.