Please beard with me

NOW that I’ve decided to do it, it’s obviously too late. When it comes to fashion, I’m always the one who arrives as everyone else is draining their glasses and saying their goodbyes. If you have a beard you can shave it all off now, because I’m going to grow one.

I’m not sure I deserve a beard. For a start I talk too much. I still feel that proper bearddom should be reserved for the strong, silent type. The facial hair covering the mouth area does its talking for it. Like the Tom Crean-type, standing on the prow of The Endurance looking out into the South Georgian sea and limiting his opinions to pithy statements about how this area was a “hoor for the pack-ice”

Or a backwoodsman walking stoically through the forests of the 19th century American frontier limiting his opinions to observations that this area was a “divil’s own place for the pumas.”