Colin Sheridan: TV rituals shouldn’t be forgotten

It felt good when my two children recently took it upon themselves to make an appointment with their granny to start watching 'Strictly Come Dancing' on a Saturday and Sunday night

Shayne Ward and Nancy Xu after he became the seventh celebrity eliminated from 'Strictly Come Dancing'. Was his eviction related to an anti-Irish bias within the judging panel? And the broader British public? Picture: Guy Levy/BBC/PA

It's hardly the most dramatic scene of any Steven Spielberg movie, but it’s memorable, nonetheless. In Catch Me If You Can, Leonardo di Caprio’s Frank Abagnale Junior sits on his in-laws’ couch beside his fiancé, Amy Adams, innocently unaware of a wholesome tradition that is about to unfold in front of him.

The television suddenly starts playing the intro music to her family’s favourite TV show. Martin Sheen (the dad) skips down the stairs, angry at himself for almost missing it. Nathalie Baye undoes her apron and runs in from the kitchen. Adams is comfortable, knowing what’s coming next.

DiCaprio’s character, already impersonating an airline pilot, a medical doctor and a lawyer at this point, looks bemused as the family crowd onto the couch around him, linking arms and singing the tune; “Has anybody here seen Kelly? K-E-double L-Y. Has anybody here seen Kelly? Kelly from the Emerald Isle.”

Initially confused, DiCaprio grimaces, mortified. Ever the chameleon, however, he adapts and, quickly understanding what’s happening, takes his mother-in-law’s hand and sings the words of a song he had just heard for the first time.

It’s a quaint, funny scene, and a reminder of what life used to be like when appointment television was king.

An event by which families could set their clocks by, especially at weekends when the week’s work was done.

While we didn’t ever link hands and sing the ‘Green Green Grass of Home’, I grew up in a house a little like this. Many of us did.

For me, the clandestine watching of Home and Away or Neighbours was nearly as illicit an act as smoking a cigarette.

It was there we learned about the strange world of runaways, surfing, and teenage pregnancies.

Funnily enough, those themes sustained Baywatch, too.

While the appeal of beach-based shows set in sunnier climes (imagine Baywatch set in Mulraney?) was obvious, the lure of Blind Date hosted by Cilla Black, was less so, yet, I was transfixed.

“My name’s Derek, and I’m from Sheffield.”

“Alright our Derek! Tell us a little bit about yourself, luv.”

Man, I loved that show. The repartee between Cilla and Tracey from Warrington. The backstories. The tension when it came to choosing one blind date over another. The big reveal. The delight versus the disappointment. The life lessons learned about acceptance and rejection. Cilla telling them what they’re date would be.

“You two lovebirds are off to Blackpool!”

It had everything and played a formative role in how I first spoke to the opposite sex. “Hi, my name’s Colin, and I cut grass during the summers.”

Later, on a Saturday night, Match of the Day was the anchor which grounded the week.

With a 10.30pm kickoff, it was always touch and go whether you’d get the nod. You always knew by the time Moira Stewart was introducing the news.

It felt good, then, when my two children recently took it upon themselves to make an appointment with their granny to start watching Strictly Come Dancing on a Saturday and Sunday night.

I had genuinely forgotten appointment television was a thing that appealed to anybody, let alone kids whose access to streaming apps is far too easy.

Would they voluntarily tolerate waiting to see how things turn out, as opposed to just using their finger to scroll on a screen, skip the boring parts, and go to the ending?

Yes, it turns out, they would, because there they sit, rooting for characters they must gradually learn about.

Was Shayne Ward’s eviction from the show last weekend related to an anti-Irish bias within the judging panel? And the broader British public?

My mother certainly seemed to think so, and that opinion was interrogated and discussed by a pair of kids who now have a healthy distrust of the British establishment as it pertains to those they once colonised.

It will serve them well when they are forced to emigrate to London in 10 years.

I was impressed, honestly, and became invested myself. Tasha Ghouri is deaf, like their aunt, so she was immediately a favourite. Montell Douglas is a Gladiator and Olympian, so what’s not to like there?

I’d never heard of Jamie Borthwick, but he seems like a decent lad who’s completely out of his comfort zone, so I empathise.

My biggest regret is hopping on the bandwagon so late that I missed Paul Merson.

I know it’s nonsense, but really, it’s so much more. It may maybe hard for a child to bond with their granny over the plot of Kobra Kai.

But it’s amazing how easy it is for a granny to find common ground with her grandkids debating the great post-colonial hangover as it pertains to Strictly Come Dancing on Saturday night.

Rituals matter. Especially the ones that happen organically. If they’re anything like their dad, they’ll remember it forever.