Terry Prone: Buying an alpaca to trim the lawn would likely be ‘shear’ madness

Geronimo the alpaca, at Shepherd's Close Farm in Gloucestershire, will be slaughtered, after his owner lost a last-ditch court bid to save him

Geronimo the alpaca at Shepherds Close Farm in Wooton Under Edge, Gloucestershire. The alpaca will be slaughtered after his owner Helen Macdonald lost a last-ditch High Court bid to save him. Picture dated: Saturday, August 21, 2021.

Someone needs to track down that guy Anon and give him — or, in fairness, her — a good thumping. Anon has left a mark everywhere, contributed mostly tedious axioms and instructions to the world. He, she, or it then left under cover of darkness, nameless and safe.

One of the marks Anon left on me, as a child, was delivered by the proverb about the nail. You know it: For want of a nail, the shoe was lost; For want of a shoe, the horse was lost; For want of a horse, the rider was lost; For want of a rider, the battle was lost; For want of a battle, the kingdom was lost; And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.