Louise O'Neill: Leap Day, proposals, and unpacking expectations

Of course, as 2020 is a Leap Year and today is February 29 which means… drum roll please… that women are ‘allowed’ to get down on one knee today and pop the question.

In late December, a woman stopped me and said, “congratulations! I heard you got engaged over Christmas.” I frowned, and took a quick look at my ring finger as if checking to make sure I hadn’t forgotten about said proposal. (Spoiler: There was no proposal.)

My partner and I went for dinner with family that evening and when I relayed the story, someone jokingly asked my father if he had been asked for permission for my hand in marriage. My dad seemed alarmed at the thought. “Louise would never be with someone who would ask her father for ‘permission’ to marry her,” he said, putting a swift end to the conversation.