'Excluding underpants, I reckon I probably only need four more items of clothing until my dotage'

OK, maybe the Green wave ended up lapping gently against the shore and didn’t sweep away all before it. I must admit to having a grudging respect for the first places to buck the green trend.

You know those local election areas that just elected Fianna Fáil and Fine Gael councillors with such a two fingers to the environment, you had to laugh. You’d wonder why they bothered opening up the ballot boxes at all. They’d just know from the weight of the box.