Poetic justice for some, jailhouse rock for others

Hello James Reilly (while you’re there) and Frances Fitzgerald too.

If you will just bear with me I’ll spell it out to you.

‘Twill boost our ill economy like nothing did before.

You simply make a little switch and then you do no more

You take the prisoners from Mountjoy, Wheatfield and Castlerea.

And put them in the old-folks homes; for their crimes there let them pay.

They’ll get cold food (some time of day), that’s if they’re fed at all.

If they call for help the attitude is, “let them shout an’ bawl.”

They‘d seldom get a shower, they’d have to live with grime

If they want a dirty protest sure they’d have it all the time.

The second part is better; a plan that couldn’t fail

Collect the senior citizens and put them all in jail

It’s there they would be happy, each with their private cell

And checked on several times an hour to make sure that they were well.

With all their needs and little wants looked after by a guard

And those who wanted exercise could jog around the yard.

A library and a workshop where they could read or paint

And a board of paid directors to deal with each complaint.

Doctors, priests and nurses will be at their beck and call,

Any shortfall in prescriptions would be lobbed across the wall.

Although my proposition some more discord may bring

I don’t expect objections (not even from Luke Ming.)

So ministers if you’re listening to this advice from me

Get rid of those advisers ; I’ll council you for free.

Mattie Lennon

Lacken, Blessington

Co Wicklow