Opening Lines

THERE are times when public opinion is a bit like one of those termite clouds that appeared in old cartoons.

The Pink Panther, Popeye and Tom and Jerry have all been at the mercy of the relentless insects. The main character would be enjoying a relaxing cocktail/spinach/beating when they would hear a buzzing noise, a cloud would appear and their chair would disappear in a small pile of dust.

In the last few weeks, the public opinion cloud has briefly alighted on teachers with megaphones, is currently working its way through Irish Water and former regulator Patrick Neary and will soon head off to the next target — no doubt someone who makes a gaffe in the upcoming elections.

A couple of months ago, the termite cloud chewed through charities. Some should have been chewed through. As a part-time participant in this termite cloud, I don’t doubt its value. There’s a lot of dead wood in Irish society but sometimes the chewing, like in the cartoons, can be a bit counter-productive.

A lot of charities suffered at Christmas because of the carry-on of a few. So it’s important to remind oneself of the good that’s being done. We often see charities as people with buckets, looking for something but we don’t often see how the money is being spent.

I was at the National Guide Dogs centre on Model Farm Road in Cork last week. They were launching their Shades week. It’s impossible not to be struck by how good an idea guide and assistance dogs are for so many people. They provide companionship, safety and independence. They even make economic sense. Independent people need less help.

It’s a very stringent training process. I met Roger who is a fundraising dog. He didn’t get through the training so instead he meets the press and the public. Roger wears an expression that seems to say “I coulda had it all kid — but I liked to party”. And another good thing about guide dogs: when they retire, it means there’s another smart dog among us who can be a good example to other dogs. Dogs are wonderful animals but I’m sure even they would admit a lot of them are eejits. We had one that barked at paint. Paint. It’s to the great credit of guide dogs that they’re so sound. With their education they could be very caustic about the rest of the Dogosphere.

“So the owner is like ‘FETCH!’ and he doesn’t even throw the stick — but the clown still runs after it.”

“Oh Facepaw! Mutts like that give all of us a bad name.”

But instead, guide dogs are very sound. Maybe that’s what Roy Keane likes about them. One suspects Keane would regard a guide dog as his kind of dog. Tidy, does a job around the place. Doesn’t get caught out of position. Not barking its mouth off unnecessarily.

Hopefully these opinions don’t provoke any negative public reaction. Oh — what’s that buzzing noise?

www.guidedogs.ie