The bigger you are, the more invisible you become

I CAN’T be bothered to be part of Ryanair’s stop-whingeing stealth ad campaign — other than to thank the world’s least loved airline for not making me sit next to my arsey teenagers while crammed in those tiny, tiny seats.

No, let’s talk instead about fat. Not almond butter or coconut oil — actual body fat. Ripples and rolls, stretched and sagging blubber.

We don’t have beautiful words to describe body fat — the tabloids have hijacked “curves” to describe size-eight celebrities — so when it comes to properly fat people, we have only words that sound ugly. Blob. Lump. Blimp. Gutbucket.