'They literally saved my life': PJ Gallagher spent three months in hospital for depression and urges others to seek help

The Dubliner said that he was out one day for a walk and "in one moment, the whole world collapsed."

Comedian and Radio Nova presenter, PJ Gallagher, has urged people battling with poor mental health to reach out for help after revealing that he spent nearly three months in hospital receiving treatment for chronic anxiety and depression.

In an interview on RTÉ's The Late Late show, the 47-year-old who is best known for his TV show Naked Camera, indicated that he had experienced "a nervous breakdown."

"I started having a depressive episode this time last year and I just had this overwhelming anxiety that kept building and building and that went into this chronic depression. I tried to hide it and I became obsessed that I would lose my job."

The Dubliner said that he was out one day for a walk and "in one moment, the whole world collapsed."

"I was in the Phoenix Park and I realised I didn’t want to live anymore, I really didn’t want to live anymore. I wanted to die.

"There was this overwhelming feeling that I was in the way. That I was making life harder for everyone around me, that I was failing at everything, disappointing people. I couldn’t go into work. I was going into (Radio) Nova every morning and apologising.

"I had a moment when I was talking to a psychiatrist after this crisis moment and Aisling my partner was saying that I need to do something.

"You tell yourself you have nothing to be afraid of - you have a good job, you have a good family and friends but then you start beating yourself up about that. You can’t even appreciate the good things. I can’t even do that. The desire is to just not exist."

Mr Gallagher said he is extremely grateful to his friend, writer Stefanie Preissner, who came to his aid when he reached an extreme low. All of his loved ones had been encouraging him to go to hospital but he was afraid if he entered an inpatient medical facility he would never leave.

"I was thinking crazy stuff. I remember waking up at 4am one morning and thinking 'this is the day.'

I’m not going to make it through today. I couldn’t take it anymore. It was 4am and there was a message from Stephanie saying I was to call her at any time, there’s no time too early or late.

"So, I called her, and she said get to my house as quick as you can. I met her and she said "we’ll get breakfast", and she found a place to get porridge. I was curled in a ball in her car, and I kept saying over and over `I can’t take this anymore.' She put her hand on my shoulder and said, `right now, all your needs are met. Just get through today.’"

PJ said that he was concerned about what being admitted to hospital would entail. However, he found his stay hugely beneficial.

"I went in and the first week was tough because I was a still a danger to myself and I thought this was the lowest I could go.

"It was the middle of Covid, they take you up and show you the ward and it was great because this one woman, one of the patients, came up to me straight away and showed me around.

Then something bizarre started to happen. I got to the stage where I couldn’t feel anything at all and then I got to the stage where I was having the crack."

He said he knew he was getting better when he responded to a bad joke which was made by one of the nurses at the hospital.

"I laughed for the first time in ages and after that, it sounds bizarre, but I was having a good time!"

PJ told Late Late show host Ryan Tubridy that he was diagnosed with depressive anxiety and recurrent depressive disorders. He admitted that he had always kept his thoughts on his mental health to himself.

"I suppose I had bouts of it (depression) before but this is something that matter how long I've been around doing standup or radio, I've never spoken about it or said it to anybody ever. I've always just kept it as my business.

"I've had bouts which were significant. I had one really bad bout when I was a teenager, and to be honest, that was dealt with at the time.

It was in the 90s so it was dealt with in a different way, first GP told me to put my runners on and and get some exercise. It's different now thankfully. After that, every so often waves would come but I knew what to do.

"I'd go to the GP, take SSRI meds and within a month or so I'd start to feel better. I'd a way of managing it so it was never a big deal. But then for the first time ever, it just got completely and utterly beyond my control to where I f***king was a danger to myself. I was a real danger to myself."

He urged members of the public who are in similar situations to reach out for help.

"You need people to fight for you and I was so lucky to have those people. I owe Aisling (his partner) and Stephanie and Elaine (his ex wife) my life. They literally saved my life. Talk, open your mouth. This time last year I was in despair but I'm still here. I've never felt better than I do now."

The Samaritans Ireland can be contacted on 116 123 whilst Pieta House can be reached at 1800 247 247 or text HELP to 51444.