Stargazers shed light on the birthday boys

The birthday boys did not look like they were having much fun.

By a strange quirk of fate, Enda Kenny and Eamon Gilmore were born on Apr 24 — but this does not necessarily dictate a similar persona, as proven by the fact they share their special day with the very un-austerity coalitionesque Barbra Streisand.

Though, maybe there is something in all that star sign malarkey after all, as the Taoiseach and Tánaiste fall within the Aries/Taurus cusp — which in astrological circles is known as the “cusp of power”.

Also, their allotted elements in the cosmos are fire and earth — and they have not flinched from pushing through the troika’s scorch-the-ground economic policies since taking up office.

But as Taurus is the sign of the bull — and again, we have had nothing but bull from both of them in the form of undelivered election promises — are they really compatible as a political couple?

Luckily, the internet offers instant advice for such matters of the astrological head and heart.

“You have the potential to grow closer than most couples,” trills one stargazing site: “Just remember if you can give each other security, beauty, nature and pleasure, you have a better chance of getting each other’s love and affection”. Oh dear, maybe we’ve strayed a tad off tangent there, but a more familiar Enda and Eamon come into view with the next snippet: “For each of you, the force of habit is strong. This relationship is a test of wills. Neither one of you is easily pushed, pulled or pressured. Once you commit to each other, this relationship can become steady, stable and a powerhouse. Neither of you likes to take chances with your time, money, energy or feelings”. Yes, that sounds like the deadly dull duo — and then comes the sentence that sums them up entirely: “You’re both a bit conservative.”

Gerry Adams offered the Taoiseach birthday greetings, and at least the moment was not as weird as when the Sinn Féin chief declared his love for Enda on Valentine’s Day.

But rather than receiving presents, Mr Kenny is going to send us all a package in the form of a helpful little booklet about the fiscal treaty we are due to vote on five weeks’ time, but nobody really knows much about. Enda claims the information will be totally unbiased, which presumably is why it refers to the “stability” treaty, which is surely as loaded a term as when Mr Adams calls it the austerity treaty.

The Government insists this is not an attempted — and very lame — brainwashing bid because the world “stability” is included in the lengthy EU document title, but then Sarkozy and Merkel could have called it the Magic Pixie Dust Pact, but that would not have guaranteed we would get showered in said pixie dust if we voted yes.

With the winds of change rolling in from the Continent, the campaign for a yes vote is already looking a bit of a mess, while no seems to be getting a good go.

Maybe the beleaguered birthday boys could do worse than calling in their cusp buddy La Barbra after all?

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War of Independence Podcast

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Commemorating 100 years since the War of Independence