It’s my Bert-day and I’ll hide if I want to

“WE DON’T do presents” said Maurice Ahern, as he strolled into his brother’s controversial birthday party last night.

And we all fell around laughing.

The Aherns might try and tell us that they don’t mark birthdays with presents but their brother is the man who brought the concept of a “whiparound” among friends to dizzying new heights.

And all those “whiparound” buddies, aka the Drumcondra Mafia, were out in force at Croke Park last night to mark the 60th birthday of the former Most. Popular. Taoiseach. Ever — a man who is undoubtedly now The. Most. Unpopular. Taoiseach. Ever.

There was Paddy the Plasterer, publican Charlie Chawke and former Fianna Fáil fundraiser, Des Richardson, all out to raise a pint of Bass to their long-time buddy.

While the present Fianna Fáil parliamentary party couldn’t get far enough away from the northside of Dublin last night, the former Minister for Finance, Charlie McCreevy, and his bubbly wife Noeleen, couldn’t resist turning up at one of the most controversial social gatherings of the year.

“Party. What party?” grinned McCreevy. “I’m off to a match,” while Bertie’s brother, Noel, just scowled at the gathered media.

The Bert’s daughters — the event planners — arrived with husbands on arm, while Bertie’s ex-wife, Miriam, proudly showed off her flamboyant boyfriend, Terry McCoy.

The fashion world was represented by tailor Louis Copeland.

But there was no sign of the man of the moment. Clearly, the man who hid in a cupboard to sell his tabloid column couldn’t be doing with the mee-ja last night.

But the Bert has always been ingenious at timing — becoming Taoiseach just as the country turned a corner economically and then disappearing into the night just before the country felt over a cliff.