Couples marry for ‘practical’ reasons

FINANCES and family planning are more important to many marrying couples than love, according to a new survey.

Avalon Relationship Counselling said most Irish women say they are getting married because they want security in order to raise a family, while the majority of men here claim they are marrying because it is the “next step” in their relationship.

The average couple attending a pre-marriage course with Avalon have been together for five years, and in many cases the decision to get married is based on a practical desire to start a family.

Among 65% of engaged couples who had pre-marriage courses with Avalon, the men knew more about their wives-to-be, than the women knew about their future husbands.

David Kavanagh, Avalon RC founder, said: “Although, on the surface, people’s motives for marriage seem to lack romance and feeling, we know from working with our clients that, generally, the relationship is based very firmly in love. However, the actual decision to marry is often prompted by other, more practical, factors.”

Shared housework does not seem to be a factor, however, as the survey reveals that 75% of men admitted they cannot cook seven different meals, and only 10% of men claimed to do an equal share of the housework — which apparently leads to a significant decrease in sexual satisfaction in the bedroom.

Only 0.1% of girlfriends have made a romantic gesture for their boyfriends in the last 12 months, according to Avalon, and only one couple in 5,000 scored the maximum score on the Avalon Mr and Mrs quiz.

Only 10% of couples can give five reasons for getting married, the majority of couples only manage three: financial reasons, to start a family and to show commitment.

Meanwhile, the most common subjects people here argue over are money, sex and housework.