Much ado about painting, hears Dáil

EVERY so often, Fianna Fáil likes to grumble about RTÉ and make vague threats to whip the national broadcaster into shape. Into Pravda-like shape, that is.

They’ve been at it again this week, following RTÉ’s report on the Brian Cowen portrait prank. The Government press secretary, of course, forced an apology from RTÉ, but that’s not enough for some Fianna Fáil TDs.

So when Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny rose to his feet in the Dáil to raise the issue yesterday morning, it was no surprise that Fianna Fáil backbenchers heckled and jeered.

“The national broadcaster receives the proceeds of the television licence fee…” Mr Kenny began.

“Take it off them,” growled one Soldier of Destiny, in something akin to Fianna Fáil’s favourite fantasy.

Thursday mornings in the Dáil offers the opposition time to ask the Government about forthcoming legislation. If they stray from procedure, the no-nonsense Ceann Comhairle, John O’Donoghue, quickly rules them out of order.

Mr Kenny couldn’t think of a piece of legislation on which he could hang questions about the RTÉ affair, but persisted anyway.

“A detective garda was assigned to go to a radio station…” said Mr Kenny.

“I have to ask Deputy Kenny to take his seat,” Mr O’Donoghue responded.

“… to get emails about this,” Mr Kenny continued.

“I am not going into that at all,” Mr O’Donoghue shot back.

“…and the crime involved was putting a nail in a wall,” Mr Kenny persevered.

“I am not going into that nonsense at all,” Mr O’Donoghue declared. “That is for The Dandy (comic) or such like.”

But Fine Gael TD Michael Ring referred to a more grown-up form of comedy. “It used to be Scrap Saturday, now it is scrap RTÉ,” he said of the Fianna Fáil dream.

“They’ll have plenty of material while you’re around,” one of the Fianna Fáil backbenchers retorted.

Labour’s Joan Burton managed to both sympathise with Brian Cowen while at the same time scoring a political point at the Government’s expense.

“While I sympathise with the Taoiseach and his family, the public has noticed that it took the gardaí six months to go into Anglo Irish Bank.”

But Tánaiste Mary Coughlan refused to take the bait, and eventually the morning’s business did get around to legitimate questions about legislation.

Except the Dáil wasn’t finished with the portrait prank yet.

Fine Gael’s Bernard Durkan criticised delays in bringing forward justice legislation when crime was continuing all round the country.

Joan Burton had a theory why crime was continuing. “The gardaí are rushed off their feet running into radio stations,” she said.