Uninspiring musical chairs game still had theatrics

AS the Dáil began to fill up yesterday afternoon, the focus of an entire summer’s worth of intrigue, gossip, barely-founded speculation and raw jealousy shifted to any non-occupied seats.

With impatience building at a painful rate - and giddy rumours involving Daffy Duck for Transport getting more absurd - the usually obstreperous Opposition even scrapped plans to hold up proceedings by forcing every item on the day’s agenda to a vote.

And despite months of bitter attempts to stay in favour, Michael Smith bowed out remarkably gracefully, sitting himself down calmly among the backbenchers far above the trenches below - not a grenade in sight.