Imagine if Apple, Google, or Microsoft, or any of those new imperialists who make Cecil Rhodes seem an avuncular philanthropist, offered to build a vast “gathering space” — a shop — in Cork’s Bishop Lucey Park, Galway’s Eyre Square, or, say, Dublin’s St Stephen’s Green.

The last time Liverpool won a league title, back in 1990, the internet had not yet been invented; but such is the incredible interest surrounding the current team’s bid to win a first title in 24 years it would be no surprise to see the worldwide web collapse under the pressure of their latest victory.

Fears about fraud and moral depravity are the biggest obstacles to universal Internet use, a survey suggested today.