Davy Fitzgerald on the Toughest Team, becoming a father again and learning to listen

The Clare hurling legend on the return of his Toughest Team, why it’s good to talk – and why there was never any doubt over the future of Ireland’s Fittest Family

Sat, 25 Mar, 2023 - 12:46

Marjorie Brennan

Davy Fitzgerald loves to talk. Whether he’s pacing up and down the sidelines shouting directions as a GAA coach or urging on his team as a mentor on Ireland’s Fittest Family, the former Clare hurler turned TV personality is never short of words. When it came to his latest TV outing, however, he says the most important thing he could do was sit back and listen.

In the second series of Davy’s Toughest Team, he mentors a group of young men facing a range of issues, from substance abuse to self-harm, as they face various physical and mental challenges, bring them from the wilds of Clare to the chilly expanse of Iceland along the way.

Fitzgerald himself loves a challenge but he says what these young men needed most was to have their voices heard and their experiences validated.

“Some of the lads that came on this programme, it was a big ask for them but I think some of them just wanted to talk. That is a big thing, even just being there to listen. They wanted to be assured that it was okay to put yourself out there and ask for help. I’m so proud of them. They have made great strides and we want to see them continue, hopefully we have made a difference,” he says.

On Davy’s Toughest Team, Fitzgerald is joined by performance coach Mattie Rice and wilderness expert Dane Galligan, as well as a comprehensive backroom team. “We have a psychologist, a strength and conditioning guy, a nutritionist… as a group, we were trying really hard to listen, to learn about each person and help them evolve in different ways. The one message I would give to anyone watching this programme is that it is good to talk. The boys were very brave to put themselves out there to do this — let’s not bottle it up. We don’t want our kids to bottle up anything, we want them to talk.”

Fitzgerald says that while mental health was an issue before covid, the pandemic has had a profound effect on young people in particular. “Being locked up for two years isn’t good for anybody, especially if you’re a teenager, those are two years of your life that you won’t get back. It has been really tough on the boys and girls of that age group. Definitely the anxiety levels and all that has gone through the roof. You would worry about them, what is out there for them, is this going to happen again,” he says.

'WHY NOT DO THIS INSTEAD?'

Working with younger people, Fitzgerald has also seen how smartphones and social media have distracted them from the once-obvious benefits of exercise and being outdoors.

“Society has changed a lot in the last 20 or 30 years. You look at the internet, social media, mobile phones — our lives revolve around those now. I’d love to see a bit more balance struck in that area. In the show, we do a lot of tough challenges but the lads get a real adrenalin rush from them. We wanted to show them that life is out there to be enjoyed — exercise is good, being out in the open is good. Their minds were blown by how much of a kick they got out of doing some of the stuff. I was saying to them, rather than take drugs or something like that, why not do this instead?”

We hear a lot these days about the dangers of online misogyny, especially the lure of social media influencers such as Andrew Tate, still being held in Romania on accusations of human trafficking.

“I’ve only learnt about him in the last few days,” he says. “It’s absolutely bananas stuff. I’m not perfect, I make mistakes, but for the likes of this guy to go on the way he goes on, I have zero tolerance for that myself. I think it is wrong.”

However, he thinks young men in particular need to be given a break, given all the pressures they face from outside influences.

Having faced a lot of abuse himself on social media, he has learned to ignore it.

“There has been X, Y and Z said about me and my family. It’s really tough because some people believe the stuff that is out there, most of it is not true. I try to ignore it as much as possible. It is only a small minority of people who think that way. I think we have to stay away from that stuff — the issue is with the people that are writing it.”

While sport would previously have been seen as a positive influence in young people’s lives, in recent years, drug use, especially cocaine, has become more pervasive in sport and rural areas, a stronghold of the GAA. It is an issue Fitzgerald believes needs to be tackled head on, with more discussion and education.

“Look, there’s no point hiding from it. It’s out there massively. I can 100% say I’ve never taken it. I have no interest in ever taking it. There is enough to do out there in life, trust me, there are enough highs and lows out there without resorting to that stuff. I remember Conor from season one of the show, he was one of the biggest examples of where that leaves you, it was great at the beginning and a real big buzz but my God he got into a hole that he couldn’t get out of. I’m going to get him to talk to a group soon. I want him because he has been through it. It is very important that we get the likes of Conor to tell the story as it is.”

Davy Fitzgerald: "Some of the lads that came on this programme, it was a big ask for them but I think some of them just wanted to talk. That is a big thing, even just being there to listen." Pic: Eamon Ward

Fitzgerald says he has brought what he has learned on Toughest Team into other areas of his life, whether that be coaching or parenting. Last year, he and his wife Sharon welcomed son Daithí Óg, a brother for 25-year-old Colm, from his previous marriage.

“It has definitely helped me to try understand lads a bit better — I want to hear about what they are thinking. With my own lads at home, maybe I’ll be a bit more understanding of different things.”

'A CONSTANT BATTLE WITH ME'

When it comes to understanding himself, Fitzgerald is refreshingly honest about how he is still a work in progress. Having had some health issues in the past, including having stents inserted a few years ago, he knows that he could be doing better. When we spoke a couple of years ago, he was having some success battling with his habit of dashboard dining, given that during the pandemic his hectic schedule had eased off somewhat. However, since then things have returned to normal and along with his trips to Waterford, the old habits have returned.

“I’m still as bad as I was. I’m 51 now. It’s hard when you’re travelling a lot. It does bother me a lot. It is so hard to break different habits at different times. I’m good for so long and I drop a stone and a half and before you know it, you’re back up there again. That is something I have to learn to deal with, it’s a constant battle with me all the time.”

Fitzgerald describes himself as “a massive dreamer”. “My problem is I can’t switch off, I’m always thinking of different things. Probably my biggest problem is I come up with too many things in my head.”

When I ask how he is doing with his work-life balance, there is a brief pause and a sharp intake of breath. What comes next is pure Davy.

“Fuck it, I’ve gone bananas. During covid, I took more time at home, especially with my mam and dad. I’ve found the last year or so, I’m back doing more stuff than I’ve ever done.”

Fans will be glad to hear that includes Ireland’s Fittest Family. There were reports that RTÉ were not going to continue with the much-loved show but Fitzgerald says he is ‘pretty certain’ it will return in the autumn.

“I don’t think there was a doubt. Our numbers are good, everyone loves it on a Sunday evening, I think it’s a special show for all the family. I am delighted that’s coming back but I’m flat out until the end of the year.”

Just as when he tastes success on the pitch, all the hard work and effort is worth it, he says.

“When you do something like Toughest Team, it is draining physically but the reward when something goes right is absolutely incredible. It is way more than a TV show to me, way more.”

Becoming a father again has also brought more joy into his life. “Daithí Óg is great, I really enjoy his company. Sharon is an incredible mam — I’m gone a good bit and she is brilliant with him.”

I have to ask the obvious question — is he holding a hurley yet?

“He is, in the last week or two, he started on it alright. I won’t be pushing him, whatever he wants to do in life. I have two great boys in Colm and Daithí Óg and I just want them to be healthy, happy and safe.”