Tommy Tiernan Show recap: Paul Merson on how addiction impacted his life and career
Tommy's guests this week were Paul Merson; Liam Ó Maonlaí and Fiachna Ó Braonáin; and Karen Dempsey. Picture: RTÉ
Former footballer, manager, and sports commentator Paul Merson spoke on this week's Tommy Tiernan Show about his journey with addiction and his work speaking to others about mental health.
In his life, Merson has struggled with drinking, drugs, and gambling.
Drinking was part of the game back in those days, he explained, and although he was drinking very heavily he described himself as "functional" never missing a day's training.
Having an addictive personality, Merson explained why he would turn to these vices.
"When you're on a pitch playing in front of 30,000-40,000 people and you score a goal or you win, the adrenaline is through the roof.
Merson explained how he would "swap addictions". When he gave up drinking, he gambled heavily and then when he got home from a US treatment facility for his gambling, he immediately began drinking.
As he was no longer playing football at this time, he drank every day until he turned 50. He shared that he was five years sober last month.
In his darkest times, Merson revealed that he had tried to end his life on two occasions because he could not see a way out of the darkness.
Now, he said he will always talk to someone when he's struggling because even the small things can fester and become something that seems insurmountable.
"I always talk openly and honestly because someone might be watching at home and going, 'Well, that's me. I might have a drink problem' or 'Am I gambling too much?'."
Merson spoke about the impact gambling has had on the people around him and how he doesn't have any close friends.
"Addictions want you on your own," he said.
Now, Merson is in a good place but he knows that he has an illness and it is one that he will always live with.
Tiernan also spoke with musicians Liam Ó Maonlaí and Fiachna Ó Braonáin about their enduring friendship and the Hothouse Flowers.
Music and love are at the core of the connection that has seen them by each other's sides through thick and thin since they were schoolboys, they explained.
"We're still intrigued by each other and each other for us, is our music," Ó Maonlaí said when asked why the Hothouse Flowers are still going strong.
"There is always a sense of possibility and adventure in the music," Ó Braonáin chimed in. "It's the draíocht that keeps it going."
The duo came armed with their harp, guitar, and tin whistle and treated Tommy to a tune before he welcomed his third and final guest, Karen Dempsey.
A psychotherapist and celebrant, Dempsey talked about living with Alopecia Universalis and how it changed her life.
At the age of 26, about three or four months after having her first child, all of Dempsey's hair fell out over the space of about three weeks.
"After my hair fell out, I realised how much privilege comes with it and how much I had relied on myself looking conventional," Dempsey explained.
"And it made me reevaluate how I bring myself into the world."
Not having hair is a big part of who she is and part of her style and Dempsey would not change it.
Many people think that if a cure came out and she could grow her hair again she would but Dempsey said that that's not the case.
We also learned about Dempsey's varied career path which has included general nursing, being a hospice homecare nurse, qualifying as a psychotherapist, and working in the Rotunda.
It was an interaction with a patient in the Rotunda that made her realise that there was something else that she was meant to do and she trained as an interfaith minister.
Still, nothing felt right and so she created Entheos - a non-denominational inclusive organisation that is authorised to carry out ceremonies for people of all faiths and none.
Dempsey wanted to offer a place for those who fall into the space between belief and non-belief to turn to.
The organisation now has celebrants in every county offering various types of ceremonies for anyone who wishes to have one.
