Film Review: Relentless bludgeoning - but no surprises - in Transformers: Rise of the Beast
Transformers: Rise of the Beasts - car and beast alike?
- Transformers: Rise of the Beasts
- ★★☆☆☆
Size doesn’t always matter, of course, but when you’re Unicron – big enough to devour planets when the mood strikes, as it frequently does – then size is definitely a factor in your favour.
Determined to escape the confines of his galaxy, Unicron craves the Trans Warp Key that will allow him flit through the universe at will, and you won’t be even remotely surprised to learn that said key is to be found on Earth.
So begins (12A), in which a former US Army Comms Tech, Noah Diaz (Anthony Ramos), teams up with museum intern and artifact specialist Elena Wallace (Dominique Fishback) to defy Unicron and save the universe, aided and abetted by a variety of Autobots – Optimus Prime (voiced by Peter Cullen), Mirage (Pete Davidson) and Wheeljack (Cristo Fernandez) – and a family of animal-inspired robots called Maximals, who are led by the gorilla-like Optimus Primal (Ron Perlman).
Opening in Brooklyn in 1994, a bright ‘n’ breezy start introduces Noah and Elena before quickly developing into a monotonous slugfest between the transforming robots, as Unicron’s Terrorcons, with Scourge (Peter Dinklage) in the vanguard, arrive on Earth searching for the Trans Warp Key (‘Why is it always Earth?’ wails the put-upon movie reviewer, who wishes that planet-devouring villains would pick on Pluto once in a while, so that Pluto’s movie reviewers would have to deal with the cinematic fall-out).
Moving the story from New York to the jungles of Peru does little to inject novelty into the plot, as the Big Angry Robots simply swap the North American landmass for its Southern equivalent and embark once more on their relentless bludgeoning.
One wonders what our future AI overlords will make of it all. (cinema release)
