A young Cork woman seeks love... with the help of an 80-year-old Dublin man
Tony Dunne and Isobel Fernandes: helping each other negotiate the world of dating from across the age gap on Generation Dating.
As anyone might imagine, dating is harder than ever nowadays — while apps and the like abound to help people break the ice, Covid has changed how we start to relate to each other in person, and sometimes... you might just want a bit of help.
Never fear — comes back on Wednesday night at 9pm on Virgin Media 1: a dating show where young people are paired with an older person to gain each other's perspectives, learn from experience, and help each other find love.
In episode one, 22-year-old social housing officer Isobel Fernandes from Cork is paired with a recently widowed 81-year-old man, Tony Dunne from Dublin — and while it starts a little awkwardly around an older generation's assumptions around sexuality, it all gets adorable fairly lively, as the pair bring each other outside their respective comfort zones for three weeks, while playing a bit of matchmaking.
The 'Cork versus Dublin' dynamic, thankfully, is intact, as Tony, an inscrutably old-world Dub, and Isobel, a proudly mixed-race and gay Corkonian, head out to a church hall, Dublin’s gay scene, a gathering of feisty female friends from the Liberties, and a ‘boob pottery’ class.
The inherent fish-out-of-water comedy aside, the programme is responsible for some genuine, heartfelt moments, from Tony's exploration of grief after the passing of his wife, to Isobel's opening-up about her experience of race in Ireland — it's good, wholesome fun that attempts to span generations and address gaps in understanding.
"I really liked the concept," says Isobel. "I liked the concept of being matched with someone from an older generation. I'm queer, and there's a lot of stigma about the older generation, and being set in traditional ways, etc. So I thought, 'y'know what? This'll be a good way to break some of that'.
"Also, as far as being mixed-race as well. I thought it would be nice to give that representation to people who aren't usually on dating shows. There's a little bit on, like, , but not much, y'know what I mean? But, it was nice, because people have preconceived ideas of an older generation."
The experience of heading out on the different activities with Tony and his prospective dates was nearly a bonding exercise between the two, as they saw the respective dating struggles their generation face. The two have stayed in touch, remaining fast friends, and plan on pints when Tony is feeling up to it after the Covid crisis.
"Tony, he's like Ireland's grandfather, y'know what I mean? I was very, very apprehensive about going to meet an older person, what it was going to be like, or whatever. As much as he's traditional, he was so, so open minded, and he wanted to understand me, wanted to get to know more about [my life].
"He's very, very open minded about the whole thing. He received me very well and vice versa. We've talked on the phone a good bit, when everything's kind of relaxed down a bit, we're going to go for a pint, just the two of us."
For all of the differences and dating-show gaga that might accompany family-friendly, prime-time entertainment telly fare, it's clear to see the heart that underlies the whole endeavour, and with some of the discussions that happen at the outset of each show, Isobel is hopeful of the same barriers continuing to break down in households around the country.
"I'm after making a friend for life out of it, in Tony, like, he's an absolute gent. When I was out looking for dates and things for him, I ended up giving my number to some of the elderly women's groups that organise activities and stuff like that, and I'm going to be helping out. I've been very anxious to get back in touch with that generation, because I don't really have any older people in my life, so that's really lovely.
"I was on a Zoom call earlier, with one of the other contestants that were on. He was saying, when he brought his match into the house, the older gay man, it was first time him and his family were able to actually talk openly about him being gay and everything, and he could talk to his grandparents. Jesus, even that small thing in itself is a massive feat, y'know. It's brilliant, like."
- hits the airwaves on Wednesday at 9pm, on Virgin Media One and Virgin Media Player
