Ageing: Finding hope in the age of high anxiety

Many issues can lead to excess worry in our latter years but there are lots we can do to support ourselves, says Margaret Jennings.

Fri, 28 Apr, 2017 - 01:00

Margaret Jennings

AS we age there are many issues that can trigger anxiety but the trick is to recognise that we can actually help ourselves or seek support if needed.

While we are all individuals, there are common life-stage markers that arise in our final decades, that can raise our anxiety levels, such as allowing ourselves to become more isolated, or questioning our role as life changes, says Dublin-based consultant clinical psychologist Dr Claire Hayes.

“The message I have though is that there really is hope. And that you stay active, that you don’t withdraw and isolate yourself and that you take responsibility for getting help,” she tells Feelgood.

Hayes who is 51 and also a lecturer and author on anxiety, has a new book out called Finding Hope In The Age Of Anxiety.

The subheading to the title, “Recognise It, Acknowledge It And Take Your Power Back”, is an invitation grounded in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which encourages a person to challenge their thoughts and actions around their difficulties.

But she also shares some of her own experiences of anxiety.

A strong social network is an important antidote to the stressors that can come with age. Picture: iStock

At her Dublin clinic, she regularly works with people in their 50s, 60s and 70s.

“Older parents might be quite distressed about children in their 40s and they’ve come for support. Some come around retirement or empty nest. They have spent their lives working and raising families and being busy and suddenly they have questions like ‘what am I going to do now?’

“Issues of mortality can feature, especially if a partner is unwell or has died. They can be very isolated, alone and lonely and have a sense of hopelessness.”

Having social support can be a big plus. Hayes refers to her experience of giving a talk to an Active Retirement group of 70 people a few years ago.

When she asked about their mortality “they all laughed and said that they had too much to be getting on with,” to give it much thought.

“My experience is that some people cope really well with anxiety as they get older because they have learnt resilience — to trust that something might work out, coming from past experience,” she says.

“And there are others who are completely floored because they haven’t experienced anxiety before and they get very distressed by it.”

How might an older person notice if anxiety levels have risen?

“They might notice their heart rate speeding up, feeling sick in their tummy, feeling sweaty and might start to worry about what’s wrong with them.

"They should go to the GP because they could have a physical difficulty and a lot of symptoms of anxiety are similar to symptoms linked to other conditions.

"For example, symptoms of a heart attack could be similar to someone experiencing anxiety, so it’s really important to get those checked.

“If they are actively withdrawing and avoiding. If they notice that they are developing an ‘Oh no!’ reaction to being invited someplace, thinking, ‘I’m not able, I don’t want to go’.

"They begin to avoid certain things that used to give them pleasure and are now quite distressed about doing — that’s a key sign as well.

If they are lying awake at night torturing themselves with ‘what’s wrong with me?’ And they could be, what I call watching scary movies in their head — really stressing themselves, without even realising that’s what they’re doing.

“It’s really important for people to understand anxiety and not to naturally assume they are going to be hit with all these triggers, but to know that if they do experience it, it’s normal,” she says.

Finding Hope In The Age Of Anxiety by Dr Claire Hayes, Gill Books. €14.99