What happens when your name and identity clash

If Caitlyn Jenner can pick her new name as an adult, why not us ordinary mortals too, asks Nuala Woulfe

I’ve a secret: I’m not comfortable with my first name and have been thinking of changing it for years. Firstly, Nuala combined with Woulfe is hard to say; too many vowels and, since I’ve been a kid, I’ve been aware my name wasn’t straight forward. My Kerry cousins gave me the whole musical Nuallah, but in Dublin, where I grew up it was always Nula. I’ve spent my whole life spelling my surname [Woulfe] or seeing it written incorrectly, but lately, as my first name has fallen out of fashion, people are spelling my name as Nula, Noole and most remarkably, even Noodle.

Like most people who have an issue with their name, I’ve a back-up one, Katherine. When I was little, my mum called me Kitty as a pet name, I was aware that my name was Nuala, but I liked the Kitty one more, so I took Katherine as my confirmation name as a means to reconnect with that earlier identity. According to a 2011 study in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, “names convey personality characteristics from warmth to cheerfulness and easy to pronounce names are judged more positively than difficult to pronounce ones.”

I’ve always felt Nuala was old- fashioned and heavy and, as a child only older women were called Nuala, while my classmates were Debbie, Anita, or Lisa. Some Gaelic names are also difficult internationally; journalist Fionnuala Sweeney became Finn at American CNN and actress Saoirse Ronan is forever pronouncing her name. As a writer of novels, I’ve an added interest in ensuring people can pronounce/spell my name and, as I’m writing a Tudor novel, I’ve been thinking Katherine or Kathy/Kitty Woulfe would better suit the historical fiction genre.

So, for a whole month I asked my Viber coffee group of mums to call me Kathy as an experiment. Though I felt a bit silly, people are more open these days; if Caitlyn Jenner can pick her new name as an adult why not us ordinary mortals too?

To my surprise, another woman in our group confided she loved the name Claire and wished she’d changed her name years ago, and a friend revealed she answered to two different names and had a cousin who was always Jane, but had a completely different name on her birth cert, no mention of Jane at all. During the month, I also did a few mad things like changing my name to Kitty on Twitter and booking the guy who came to clean my carpets under Kitty Woulfe. For 30 days, when Kathy pinged on Viber, it was a bit of a shock, but Kitty felt familiar, but how can you pick a new name, even a pen name and be sure about it forever?

Writer Eileen Gormely, aka Helen Hunter, was the first person I ever met with a pen name. In recent years she became part of the erotic writing duo Evie Hunter. Eileen warned me it can be hard to generate publicity, give interviews or even do book launches with a name other than your given one. “It’s also surprisingly hard to sign a book with another name,” she says.

I was swinging towards Kitty, but was Kitty Woulfe ridiculous? Two animals together? It is, however, memorable. Irish Examiner columnist Terry Prone believes that, “an unusual name can be good if it can be pronounced”.

Terry also believes that her unusual first name and surname together made her stand out in her career. Though I’m not looking to change names to become more noticeable, my name search is more like putting on a garment and feeling, yes, this fits, this is right. Experts say you can play around with your original name to get the ‘right’ feeling, but I’ve tried that already and it doesn’t work. I’m not a Fionnuala, I’m not Finn, it’s too masculine, I’m not Fenella (Scottish version) and though I’ve seen Nuala anglicised to Noola I don’t like it visually.

As I expected some of the Viber mums have since switched back to Nuala out of habit, though one or two stuck with Kathy and Kitty. One of my Viber mums told me she and her son both adore his middle name and would consider calling him that from now on, as they’re due to move soon to another part of the country.

I could eventually change my name by deed poll; over 600 Irish people do so every year. It is a very simple process, you just need an official form, a witness and at most €60, but, until then, I’m currently practising my signature as Kitty Woulfe and Nuala ‘Kitty’ Woulfe. Meow, howl?

Quite, quite ridiculous, I know, but it’s beginning to sound right.