Parent’s guide to surviving the rest of summer break
MIDWAY through the school holidays, you’re realising this is more of a marathon than a sprint. You’re wondering how you’re going to survive the next month.
It’s a perfectly normal parental sentiment, says clinical psychotherapist Joanna Fortune (solamh.com), who points out that when children start school — and with many now in day-care — parents can feel ill-equipped at keeping them busy during long breaks. Frustration and impatience can set in but it’s not too late to turn things around.
Fortune emphasises the importance of maintaining structure during school holidays. “While it won’t be as rigid as during the school year, structure is vital so children can anticipate with a degree of certainty.”
To survive the summer break, she encourages parents to set aside time everyday just to have fun with children — something that brings a loving connection. “Have a water fight with them in the garden or put on the sprinkler and have everyone run through it, including Mum and Dad.”
For Fortune, the hallmarks of good holiday activity are that it’s easy, fun and free to do. “Parenting has become very competitive — it [should be] about spending time, rather than money.”
Set little collaborative challenges for children – find opportunities where they can experience mastery, whether learning how to do origami with you or going to summer camp to do a new activity alongside other kids. “New activities encourage brain development.”
Right now is a good time, says Fortune, to ask children what they’ve loved most so far about summer and if there’s anything they’d like to do that you haven’t got around to yet. Set parameters, she warns – it shouldn’t involve flights or hotel stays and should be within a budget decided by parents.
And don’t fear kids’ boredom, advises Fortune. “It’s good for them to experience boredom – it allows them develop a capacity for desire, what would they like to do. It’s important in life that we call all self-entertain.”
She suggests creating a boredom jar – put inside pieces of paper with fun activities, as well as household chores. If your child complains of boredom, ask if he’d like to select an activity from the jar. “He might end up with a chore – that’s the risk he takes.”
Do embrace the extra degree of madness that summer holidays bring. “And ensure you have fun with your own friends – if you’re relaxed, your children will be.”
Maintain structure — ensure that every day certain key things happen.
Keep screen time to school-time limits. Encourage book-reading over screens, include library tips where child can select own book.
Find time each day to do something fun with your child.
Don’t let bedtimes get out of sync — try not to push them out later than 30 minutes past school year bedtimes.
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