Trying to become Santa’s Jingle Belle

There are many things you don’t expect to do in your 20’s, and becoming Santa’s not-so-little helper would have topped my list, had I even considered it a possibility.

Having undergone the unfortunate evolutionary jump from excited kid to “it’s not even Hallowe’en yet!”, I had my concerns about my ability to be jolly and nice in September, but Santa needed his elf helpers and despite my only previous experience having been leaving out milk and cookies for the famous man in red, who was I to let him down?

When I arrived at the Kingsley Hotel, Cork City, I soon forgot the reality of September outside the front doors. A suite normally reserved for business meetings was transformed into a Winter Wonderland for the day of auditions to be an elf helper.

“I’m looking for elf helpers with Christmas,” said Mr Claus, “I don’t need any shy and retiring types, but helpers for the elf team with personality, common sense and a deep understanding of magic. Imagine at Fota Island Resort will get a daily dusting of magic, so I need elf helpers up to speed with modern magical practices and complete masters of the art of totally suspending disbelief. It also helps if they can make toys super-quickly, read small childrens’ handwriting and the occasional reindeer-whisperer would be more than welcome.”

The room was set up with round tables where the wannabe elf helpers were busy signing their applications with Mr Claus’ words in mind, trying to make him believe they’re the boy or girl he’s looking for. Half-an-hour before auditions were due to start, a team of eager helpers were there, and clearly excited at the prospect of spending the lead-up to the festive season in Lapland, as Irish elves.

The walls of the suite were decorated with descriptions of elves that applicants could audition as, if they didn’t want to create their own. I, of course, hadn’t prepared a character or an act, hoping to get away with cheerfulness. Alas, I was wrong.

Panic started to set in as I read the profiles of the very talented elves; singers, dancers, jokesters. As the old song goes, “I can’t sing, and I can’t dance but I can drive a tractor!” (I can’t even drive a tractor.) After a last minute Google of Christmas related puns, I decided to audition as Jingle Belle, the fun, happy go lucky elf that always has a joke up her sleeve.

I wasn’t sure if it was the prospect of being photographed in a head-to-toe elf costume, or standing on stage in front of three judges, which would definitely be a new experience for me, but I was more nervous than I’d care to admit. Although I was sure I would enjoy the experience, there was a huge element of nerves in the Lapland equation.

This, however, quickly faded away as soon as I was sure of my party piece. At least if I was telling jokes, they were supposed to be laughing at me! Also, who better to be than an elf that’s going to keep kids laughing and giggling while hopping with excitement in the line to meet Santa, or keep all the elf helpers in the North Pole in high spirits while they make, wrap and pack the presents to go under the tree?

Donned in my blue elf costume, complete with a hat I wish I could have kept, with my elf chosen, I was as ready as I was ever going to be. It was time to interact with my fellow elf helpers and see how everyone else was looking forward to facing the judges.

At this stage in the audition process, the line had spread from the suite to outside the building. People were queuing to fill out their applications and have their photo taken with Mr Claus to accompany it. Singers, dancers, jugglers, performers, all eager to get in front of the judges and prove their elf talents, all in the pursuit of spreading the Christmas Cheer (and €8.65 an hour).

I took the opportunity to talk to some of the first girls that came in.

Shona McCarthy, 16, had this to say about her experience. “I love working with kids, so I think this would be a great opportunity to work with them and have fun with it really.”

One group of hopefuls even admitted to cutting school to audition for the day! Being Santa’s right-hand elf was clearly more important than double maths on a Monday morning. I can’t say I disagree with them there. Although, there’s not much that IS more important…

Olivia Buckley, one of the creators of Imagine, also sat down with me for a chat about what lead to the establishment of the promising children’s venue.

“We believe strongly in the power of dreams and magic,” she said. “We live in a world where everyone is stuck on their phones, and we want to create a place where people are pulled out of that, and spend time together, a place where everyone is surrounded by magic. We wanted to create a kind of dreamworld for both adults and parents.

The time had come, I was next in line and it was my turn to face the three judges, X Factor-style. Sometimes, you get so filled with the spirit of a thing that the enormity of it can fade away, and I was lucky to have that happen to me.

I was ready, I was Christmassy (months early, but happy to be so), and I was going to pun those judges away.

I made my way to the stage, introduced myself as my persona for the day, Jingle Belle, and began my audition.

“Why do you think you’ll make a good elf?”

“I’m the funniest elf you’ll ever meet, there will be no unhappy kids when I’m around, and that’s for sure!”

“Why so?”

“I always have a joke up my sleeve, I’m one of the happiest elves and I always know how to make the kids laugh!”

“Great! What’s your act today?”

“I have a few jokes to tell you!”

“Awesome, let’s get started!”

“Why did Scrooge win the football game? Because the ghost of Christmas, passed!”

“What’s the coldest month? Decemberrrrrr!”

“What did Adam say to Eve the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas, Eve!”

Reasonably assured that I had tickled the judge’s fancy and adequately performed my duties as an elf helper auditionee, my stint on the stage was done.

All in all, my experience as an elf for the day was probably one of the most fun things I’ve ever done. The people behind the magic that is Imagine at Fota are genuinely dedicated people who are in it to make people happy.

The aim to bring back the essence of family Christmas time, in a world where everyone is glued to a phone, laptop or TV, there was never a moment when I thought anything different.