Helping your child make the transition to primary school

Maybe it happened in the last few days or perhaps the big moment will come next Monday. 

When your little one stands in front of you, wearing his new uniform for his first day at school, you might well experience an instant of non-recognition — ‘Who is this child? Where did my baby go?’

First days at primary school spell transition, letting go and the beginning of a new era. But for all its newness — indeed because of it — you need to ensure as much as possible is recognisable and identifiable to your child. This will help him feel safe as he ventures into so much that’s unknown.

It starts with the most practical stuff, says Deirdre Sullivan, training and development officer with the National Parents’ Council Primary. If you haven’t done so already, she advises parents to make sure junior can identify his own things — coat, shoes and lunchbox.

“Put name tags on inside of coats and jumpers. Put a mark on the lunchbox. Lunchboxes can be tricky to open — let them practice doing this at home.”

Sullivan says it’s important that parents enjoy their child making this step into their own independence.

“Talk encouragingly about what they’re doing at school. Let them ask questions.”

It’s also a good idea to ask children to do a chore or two at this stage — such as setting the table — so that taking instruction at school won’t be strange for them.

“Get them to sit quietly and concentrate on an activity,” Sullivan recommends.

Most parents will feel excited but also nervous for their child. Will he settle? Will he fit in? Will he be ok when I leave? Will he make friends? Try to hold in any signs of emotion during these early days, counsels Sullivan. “It’s a parent’s responsibility to ensure their child feels safe. If children see tearful parents, they’ll feel ‘oh, this isn’t a nice thing’.”

Be on time bringing your child to school and again collecting him. “You don’t want him panicking at the end of the day when he doesn’t see your face.” And don’t be surprised if he comes home after a day or two and says: ‘Ok, I’ve been to school now, that’s it’. He may not realise that school is for good for the foreseeable future and that he’ll be going again. So you need to say ‘Yes, you’ll be doing lots of new things tomorrow and I’ll be waiting to hear how you got on and who you played with’.

For your child, getting used to a very structured day, as well as new faces and environment, is going to be exhausting. He will be tired, so do set up a good routine around bedtime.

Top tips

* Ensure child can identify his own belongings.

* Give child a good breakfast before he heads out.

* Choose lunchbox foods that child really likes but that are in line with school healthy eating policy.