We’re married for 45 years but I’m attracted to another woman

Q. I have been married for 45 years, much of it sexless, and I am beginning to feel sorry for my wife.

We are childless and I feel I have been very unfair to her by not fulfilling the relationship. Although we are both older, and the urge to do some of the things of our youth has diminished, I have recently found myself drawn to another woman. I think she is the type of person, body and soul, I wish to be involved with. I do not want to break up my marriage, yet I know I’d like to explore another relationship on a different level. Is this possible?

A. When you jot down all the pros and cons of this situation — as I expect you have done several times — the “right” thing to do is a no-brainer.