My partner wants to spice up our sex life with kinky costumes

Q. My partner of two years has started watching porn and wants to spice up our sex life with dress-up games, such as nurses and doctors. I’m squirming at the thought. I enjoy sex, but prefer to play it straight. How to I deal with it?

A. Porn is sex that has little to do with reality. It portrays an image of the body-beautiful, featuring men and women who are young, toned and frequently airbrushed. Often the sexual intercourse goes on for a long time and can be quite aggressive.

For many people, porn is a means to instant gratification on their own. It is not about the love and intimacy that are the marks of a committed relationship. The pornography viewer’s relationship is with the images on the screen. Unfortunately, this is where many people learn about sex. And if they habitually feed on pornography, it’s a diet that can be harmful.