You shouldn’t feel pressured into having sex

Q I am 17 years old and have been going out with my boyfriend for over a year. At first we simply kissed and cuddled but we quickly moved on to heavy petting. On a couple of occasions we’ve got close to having sex, which to be honest I found a bit upsetting. I don’t want to get pregnant and I don’t want to lose my virginity in a friend’s grubby bedsit. What do you think?

A It can be confusing when you’ve been physically intimate and decide not to go on to penetrative sex. Let’s look at what is happening. You are going out with your boyfriend for over a year and I presume you enjoy being with him but you are unsure about what you want to do next.

At 17 you are a sensual human with sexual feelings. You are developing and at a significant transition stage. Moving from adolescence to adulthood is a process. You have to think about how you want to start out as an adult.